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Recognizing the Dimensions of the Heart
There are three steps in energizing your heart:
The first step in energizing your own heart is to recognize the aspects of heart in others. The model of the four dimensions (shown to the right) makes it easier to see the many qualities that appear in each different heart. Recognize the hearts of friends, then of strangers. And since you know you cannot see yourself so well as by reflection,
I, your glass, will modestly discover to yourself that of yourself which you yet know
not of. If you can first recognize the dimensions of the heart in others, then what you see in others you can find in yourself. If you can't recognize in a friend the qualities of a broad heart, for example, you'll not be able to notice it in yourself either. But when you do see a broad heart operating in a living person, you'll have a clue to finding this same dimension in yourself. When you see a deep heart in someone, appreciate it. When you see an elevated heart, praise it. When you see a broad heart, associate with it. When a forward heart appears, acknowledge its courage and creativity. When you find a full heart, stand in awe and wonder before it. Having recognized the greatness of a person's heart, celebrate it by a compliment. By complimenting others, you strengthen those same qualities in yourself. Compliments echo. You'll receive back and store up all the compliments you give away. To give a good compliment is an art form. Your compliment must be sincere and true in order to penetrate the defenses of the other person's heart. Be careful to purify your compliment from any implied put-down, which can so easily sneek into a compliment. For instance, when you say, "You look better," you give a compliment with an attached put-down. The other person immediately thinks, "I must have looked bad before." There are three points to remember when giving compliments: first, be completely positive and leave out any implied putdown. Second, state the observable evidence that supports the compliment, and third, connect the compliment to the person's heart, to make it clear you're talking about the person, not their looks or behavior. The way of giving the gift of a compliment that will empower the other person is a topic in chapter three of Energize Your Heart. |
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